My job mostly sucks. I don't have one of those jobs that I go to because I love it. It's more like the job you go to because you need to feed your family and keep them insured and clothed. There is one shining moment per week I am allowed however. Without going into too much detail as to what I do, it's closely related to stomping out crime. As people who stomp out crime like to do, we meet about it of course. At this weekly meeting we go over some of the "best" crimes of the week. This has brought to my attention the awesome innovation of criminals, specifically the weapons they choose to use. I'm going to highlight one per week, and I may back track some as they deserve the mention here.
This week's weapon winner: Telephone
Have you ever been mad at the person on the other end of the phone and all you can do is beat the phone against the counter? I think that's how this got started. Someone was probably on the phone with customer service somewhere. Customer service can piss you off like nobody's business. Maybe they had to call customer service because their baby daddy wouldn't. Maybe they had to call about the cell phone overage that they noticed on the bill but had no idea why it was there. Maybe when they were on the phone the customer service rep eluded to the fact that the person they share the line with was making a lot of calls. That this person was possibly making all those calls to the same number, at all hours of the night. Maybe it was a number that was recognized as a sisters number. Not his sister, knowwhaimsayin? Possibly after talking to a snarky customer service rep and then realizing what was going on made someone mad. Then he walked through the door. Who wouldn't throw the phone at him? Telephone was definitely the best weapon to choose here.
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10 months ago